Pity Party

Please allow me to be vulnerable right now. I am a mother, a wife, a teacher, a friend and now trying to start a business. I am struggling with my confidence. I am going to swim around in my pity pot for a moment if you don't mind. I will try not to get you wet.

While I wait and wait and wait for my first children's book to be finished, I worry that it will lose momentum and my followers will lose interest. It was supposed to be done in 2010 but some delays keep pushing it further and further in to 2011. That is ok because there is a plan for my book that I may not understand. I still worry. I am definitely not worried about why it is being delayed.

My illustrator, Denise Clemmensen, is working hard on it and the illustrations are beautiful. She is very talented. I do have a fear Denise might not want to work on my other books in the future if this takes too long. Number two worry is that we aren't even close to being done. When she completes the illustrations, we still have to do the cover, proof, layout, digital form, endorsements, print, and who knows what else. It feels like my book is taking forever. Its like when your friends tell you they are pregnant and then the baby comes. It seems like there is nothing in between until...you get pregnant! Then there is morning sickness, popping your pant buttons, big clothes, veins, weight gain, emotions, crying, getting big, baby moving around, getting bigger, sitting on your ribs, getting bigger, can't sleep, baby sitting on your lungs, can't breath, even bigger, plugs, water, pain, that is not coming out of there, it is coming out of there, it did come out of there, crying, emotions, a deflated tummy and a beautiful baby.  Same with a book. There is a lot in between. (see the book process in earlier blogs).   Good things come to those who wait. So I wait... and not for Godot.

Meanwhile, I have been trying to market myself, my book and Flip Side Stories™ so I can create a following before the book comes out. But...I have no idea what I am doing, if I am doing it right or if I am doing it wrong or should I be doing it at all. I have my Facebook  Flip Side Stories fanpage up and rolling. I think it is stuck on 187 likes. I am going to assume its broken and won't tick higher than 187 rather than feeling like a failure to add fans.

What am I doing wrong? Now, I don't have a product yet. Maybe that is it. Maybe I am not putting relevant things on it. Which brings me to the question, what is my goal for my FB site? I think it is to provide inspiration about kids, life and looking at the flip side, as well as, kid related information and resources for parents. I may need more organization. I am not even sure if what I am posting is being read. I see the stats but how do I get my fans to interact with my site. People are busy.  I need to accept and embrace that fact and continue to offer the information in small spurts and hope I am providing people with relevant and useful information.

I am also using twitter which I am basically learning as I go. I am still not sure how to gain a following and how to direct them to my other sites. Again, even with links to my FB, it doesn't seem that anyone is visiting or "liking" it. Do I need more of a draw there? All of this, makes me feel like I am in school again trying to fit in somewhere. I bounce from group to group trying to find a place. I am legitimately choosing to following relevant twitters and hoping they find me relevant as well. I let it effect me personally and I know I shouldn't. If I could get my numbers up, I wouldn't notice as much. Sure I would.  I will try not too.

My goal is simple. I am a teacher. If I am not in a classroom, I am still trying to teach. I want to share my books and stories with children and the adults in their lives. I want to help parents understand their children and give them tips and techniques for creating a world of empathetic and confident children. They are our future. I believe Flip Side Stories is a way to teach them how to look at the world, people and situations in a different way so they can respond to their world in a more productive way. I hope to teach them to be more giving and helpful citizens in society.

Please follow my blog and become a flipsider with me. Learn how to see things from a different perspective and walk in someone else's shoes.  Please take some time to view the rest of my blog which I have been writing since the beginning of the publishing process.
Please share with everyone you know. Help me with our Flip Side revolution.

I am now climbing out of my pity pot to continue eating my elephant...one bite at a time. Thanks for letting me open up.