Moms on IPhones. What are Kids saying?

It has been a while since I've posted. I  have some moments recently that have struck me and I wanted to share them.

The excitement was building for weeks. Thoughts of candy danced in their heads and costumes paraded around the house. Then the day came. Halloween! Dressing up at school, costume parades amongst peers, parties in classrooms filled with food and games and fun. I was lucky enough to be able to relive some moments in my childhood Halloween memories (in a costume even). My daughter was Merida from Brave and I was her queen mother turning into a bear.

I traveled from one room to the next to see how my other two kids were doing and let them know I was around. I was helping in my daughter's room on this day. Near the end of the party in her room, I sat down with the group of kids to read some spooky (not-so-spooky) Halloween stories that I loved when I was a kid. I love reading to kids, especially my books. wink.

When I was done reading, all of the children but one got busy putting the room back together. One young lady stood by my side. I hadn't paid much attention to her until I heard her speaking to herself or maybe to me. I heard her say, "Look at all the moms on their iPhones." I followed her gaze in the direction she was looking. Sure enough, they were all nose deep into their phones. At that moment, I was not but it could have been me too. "They are ignoring us again." UHG! Stab in the heart. Slap across the face.
The blood rushed to my feet. Guilt welled up inside me. I tried to make her feel better (or change her mind about it) by saying that maybe the mom's were taking pictures or sending pictures of the party. She didn't respond to that comment as if to tell me to stop kidding myself (I saw you on your phone earlier.)

That really hit me. My kids will tell me if they feel like I am not being present. I try very hard not be on the computer or phone when they are around (or around my family and friends for that matter).
To hear it from a child who was not mine and whose mother wasn't even there, just crushed me. She was making an observation from across the room at random parents and telling me honestly how that makes her feel. She even used the word "us" ("ignoring us") as if it to say it on behalf of all of the kids who feel this way. Wow.

I will never forget her words. It was a paradigm shift for me. We need those once in a while. We need to hear or see the Flip Side to really understand the impact we are having on others. Take a look around and see who is really watching you.

Adversity to Adventure

I often go out to schools to talk to children about walking in someone else's shoes, about my journey as an author, seeing another point of view and about looking at the Flip Side. I really love my job. As a former Elementary School Teacher, I am enjoying teaching children again and sharing my passion for writing and looking at the Flip Side.


After my presentations, the children are very excited about me as an author and how they relate to my stories. Many schools send me packets of letters from the children that touch me and make me laugh. I often receive an email or two from kids who really connected and feel the need to further communicate with me. Many will say that they want to be writers someday and share some personal experiences. I LOVE to receive letters from the children.

Last week I visited a school of near 400 kids. I had a great visit. When I shared that I was a twin, a young lady raised her hand to share that she is a twin as well and her brother was in the front row. I acknowledged what we had in common and moved on. Later that day, after I got home, I received an email from this young lady, "S. the Twin".

hi I have been looking at you're websites and on one there were no comments so I felt the need to write something so that's me S. the twin with the green headband my email is xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

p.s. I LOVE WRITEING TOO BUT AS YOU CAN SEE I'M BAD AT SPELLING.

S.

I was delighted to hear from her. I wrote her back (and told her that her spelling wasn't as bad as she thinks) and I told her that I was so happy that she had written to me.

About a week later, I got another email from "S. the twin" (cute). It touched me right down to my smallest heart string. I shared it with my husband and later my family at our Easter dinner. It touched everyone. It was the epitome of what Flip Side Stories is all about and further what "Just Because" is all about. Let me share:

"thanks so much for emailing me it really means allot I actually love writing I have written tons of story's that i think you might like but I still love you're story's because of the message its suppose to send I think I might be good at writeing story's like that because when I was two my parents got divorced and my mom was the custodeal parent we went to salivation army for most of our clothes and we went to the good fellows this is because there were two two year-olds one four year-old and another 6 year-old and my poor mom was a stay at home mom who had just recently at the time gotten a job as a waitress but we never knew anything was ever wrong because she always said it's going to be an adventure just like when we lost our house and had to move thats what she said its going to be an adventure but we got through every thing we may not had everything we wanted but we sure did have lots of love and thats what it's all about. 
 love,S.                                                  
p.s. we did finally find out about the it's going to be an adventure my sister C."

She and her family are an example to be followed. She saw herself in the second family in "Just Because". She could relate and see the FLip Side of a difficult situation with the help of her brave mother. I can't thank her enough for sharing her story.

Because of her story, I have decided to create a place for kids to share their stories and their connections with Flip Side Stories. I will share their stories and how they saw the Flip Side of Adversity.

I will share this blog post with her.  If you would like to leave her a comment, she will see this. I am sure she would love to hear from you. Thank you.

Video Message on the Flip Side

A Video Blog Update!

See what's happening on the Flip Side!

Join the A-mob-azon!

http://www.theflipsidestories.com/a-mob-azon.html

Spread the word!

Free link to an animated and interactive version of my book!

Buy a book and leave a review on Amazon 

and let me know on www.facebook.com/flipsidestories

on 

2/12/12

February 12, 2012

Halloween on the Flip Side (revised)

A Kid and Parent's Halloween Point of View

Kid: 

It's creepy things that lurk and hide.

It's scary movies where things die.

 Parent: 

Halloween is month long fun?

Not for me, but for my son.

Kid:

It's witches, goblins, ghosts and ghouls.

It's dressing up and going to school.

Parent:

It's choosing costumes months ahead

Changing minds, "I want this instead."

Kid:

It's corny mazes and the pumpkin patch.

It's creaky doors with a latch.

Parent:
They pick their pumpkins, 20 per?

I hand my cash right to her.

Carving's fun...to watch, you see,

All the work is done by me.

Kid:

Haunted houses, fear is fun.

Haunted forest where you must run.

Parent:

I thought that i-- had outgrown

Haunted houses that creak and moan. 

They make me go out of fear

They think it safe if I am near.

Kid:

Parties made for dressing up.

Grab a costume to put on pup.

Parent:

It's all the parties that I will drive,

I used to go to four or five.

I went out and had MY fun

Drop them off and now I'm done. 

Kid:

House to house we use our feet.

For Trick or Treating can't be beat.

And then... we eat and eat and eat and eat.

Parent:

House-- to-- house--we-- use-- our-- feet.

Trick or treating up the street.

All the candy to rot their teeth

It's the dentist, we bequeath.

I say all this, I do complain.

But I love it all just the same.

The Kids are Back in School

First Day of School with Mom! My babies.

My kids started school this week. It becomes a bit of a panicky time for me. I get a little crabby (rowwl), a little weepy (sniff) and a little excited (squeal).

Notice it says "flip". :)

It is my job to teach my kids responsibility and accountability. I took them school shopping to help pick out their school supplies.

Oh, the fun for them as they toss supplies into the basket like they've won a free shopping spree. I hear "Can I have this? Can I have that? I NEED this. So and so has that."

I am bombarded by lists and office supplies and art supplies and voices (some high pitched whines. Because that works? I think not) and background noise of the store. Great for my ADD. i want to run to the clothes section for ME and get swallowed up by the racks and disappear. I hold strong and stay calm.

The weekend before school starts, we drag out all of the supplies and begin to sort them. Again, it is easier to do it myself but the teacher in me says there is a lesson in here somewhere. Another voice says insanity is sure to follow.

School supplies are strewned wall to wall and now mixed up because I have misplaced their lists. Note to self, don't start project without all ingredients laid out. Disaster is imminent.

Now they are old enough to pack lunches. Teaching moment, right? But it's easier if I do it myself but we must teach independence. The mess comes first then hopefully the ability to care for themselves comes later (sooner than later).

Backpacks are packed, endless notes and information cards are signed and checks (all their college money) are made out to someone named Holy Name. Breathe.

Kids are off to bed while it is still light, dragging their feet trying to make summer last but one minute more. That would be that minute that I mentioned in previous posts that I don't love about being a mom.

One of our favorite books.

Get to bed! Get to bed! Get to bed!  GET TO BED! Before they put me in a straight jacket or your father hears that one more time and makes it his mission save mom from being taken away leaving him to be the sole caregiver.

I try to stay calm and loving so they will have a perfect first day of school.  Perfect is relative. Our perfect includes a little bit of a crazy mom. They scramble when it appears the paddy wagon is coming for me.

Then I spend the rest of the evening getting a special breakfast ready, tying up loose ends and laying out clothes to make the morning routine go smoothly (I know, the clothes,  another teaching moment- tomorrow). I am always hopeful I can make this a common routine but it usually wanes after a week or so. Ok, after a couple of days.


Today is the third day of school and it is a full day for everyone. I dropped off all three of them and watched them walk into the school all by themselves. My little Kindergartener walked in ahead of the other two with his backpack on his back, faded into a pack of kids, turned the corner to his classroom and never looked back. The other two (second and third grade) repeated the same turning the opposite way to their classrooms. I was left at the outside door by myself wondering if they will be ok and more so, will I be ok?

Is There A FLip Side?

I am home now. Do you hear that? Silence except the fish tank burbling, the breathing dogs and....and.....what's that? Ahhhhhh-ahhhhh-ahhhhhh. Choirs of angels singing. I am free. Cause I'm free to do what I want,  any old time. For the first time in 8 years, I have a full day to do whatever I want.

Guess what I am doing today? Lunch duty!!! hahahahahahahaha!

(I do have a mani-pedi later too)

Daddy walking with Kindergartener. 

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